music exams and practice

With 30-something days to "freedom", I figured that between now and then, I'd need to be in the office for just 8 days. It's time for me to bid farewell and show my appreciation to those who were acquainted with me either through work or otherwise.

It's been more than a year since I started taking yangqin lessons and I believe I've made decent progress. I'm fairly comfortable with how things are going currently, until my teacher got a little pushy with "persuading" me to sign up for the graded exam.

I must admit that I didn't think too hard about what I wanted out of these lessons, which started out of a gestating desire to learn the instrument since I was in school more than 10 years ago. After all, I wasn't about to enter a music competition. Neither was I depending on the instrument as my source of livelihood. I just hoped to master the instrument, well enough so I can perform in an ensemble.

Still, that was not good enough. The question remains: "How far do I want to go?"

I'd imagine it can get rather unnerving for my teacher. She sees my enthusiasm, yet I am under no pressure to "get things right". So what if I consistently fail to execute the crescendos and fermatas? I also happen to have the undesirable habit of backtracking when I stumble on notes. Better to play the wrong notes once and continue with the music than to repeat the same phrase, so says my teacher. Suggestions aplenty, but I don't really need to act on them.

I have my gripes about graded music exams. I certainly won't want to spend all my time perfecting the few exam pieces and scales, to the effect of mastering only the handful of exam pieces that everyone else had slogged over, and risk smothering any modicum of passion I still have for the instrument. Elsewhere in the world, I've met amateurs who were either self taught or coached without exams, and still play decently. I remain skeptical of the prevailing view that exams must accompany any music instruction to achieve any level of competency and accomplishment on an instrument. I'm also reluctant to lend implicit endorsement to the local music exam culture.

As much as I dislike going the way of exams, I find it inevitable that I'd have to take them, if I were to get any serious on this instrument I'm picking. For the reasons alluded to before, it will help my teacher and myself if we had very specific goals, and if these goals translates to some larger objective. She's probably asking the same questions I'm asking, along the lines of how much she should teach and how insistent she should be on me "getting it right". I'd see my preparations as opportunities to overcome major practical shortcomings, and for the first time, master solo pieces "fit for aural consumption". The Grade x certificate is really not the point.

So that's the answer to my teacher. Preparing for exams sucks time and life, but it seems like a worthy short term goal to have. Hopefully, I'll balance it against my other aspirations for the instrument. Balance is key.